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Monday, June 14, 2010

I'll Think So You Don't Have To

I turned 35 over the weekend.  Or was it 53, I can't remember.  I started thinking about all the stuff I had learned over the years.  Seriously, it could fill a book or maybe even a website if I added pictures.  I decided to pay special attention and to write down the most important new stuff I learned and to pass it on to you, free of charge.

Let's start with the Padres.  I went to the game Friday night and made a huge mistake at the concession stand.  Instead of a hot dog I ordered a fish taco.  From Rubio's, or should I say "Rubio's" as it has absolutely no resemblance to the fish tacos sold at his restaurants.  The cabbage was on the bottom (whas wid dat?), the fish was some sort of flat, pre-formed fishstick pancake, and the sauce, crap, there was at least a quarter cup of extra, extra mild "salsa" on top, making the whole thing a gooey wet mess.  Horrible.  Yo Ralph, you try one of these things with your name on it?  THEY SUCK!  You owe me $4!

I also learned that if you sit in the cheap seats at a night game, bring a blanket. One for each person because if you are short one, you won't get one.  That's just how it works.

The next day I went to Stone Brewery to go on the brewery tour and learned something very important. The tours are free but they "sell out" exactly 2 hours in advance and you must be there with your entire party to get a reservation ticket and the only thing to do there for 2 hours while you wait is to eat a $13 burger.  If you're sitting around on the couch and say "we'd better go" and the lazy person next to you says "nah, we got time" you should just leave him home.  As for the tour, a special shout out to Stone for squeezing me in since I was the guy who said "nah, we have time" and got there after it was sold out.  

Here's one for the tourists reading this blog and thinking "Hey, I thought this guy was the San Diego expert but all he writes about are stupid things".  OK, so this one is for you.  June Gloom is real.  Since June 1st my backyard has clocked no more than 4 hours of sunshine. I read somewhere that this is all George Bush's fault and that June Gloom is the result of his failed policies, but I don't know nothing about that.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Nah, it's because of the new health care reform act. Socialism causes it. That and teaching kids to speak Mandarin.